Change

one can either move with life's chances, or they can drown and be swallowed by them. Change is one of the most frightening things I can think of. It leads to the unknown. You never know where it is going to take you. Change can be good or bad. The only real thing that is always the same about change is that it happens even when you don't want it to. People change, relationships change, the lands change, everything is always changing. Things come together, and things blow apart. The heart of all of this is change. One can either go with the tide of change, and ride it to the new destination, or they can try to fight it. Its almost always another constant about change - those that fight it tend to be flooded over by it anyway. It is just much less pleasant, and far more painful, for their efforts to resist it.

Change is, in itself, neutral. We are the ones that make it good or bad, easy or hard, enjoyable or painful. The changes, itself, are happening simply as a facet of life. The struggles that we as people have with them are with make it so frightening. There have been many changes in my life recently. I cannot remember a time in my life that so much has changed so quickly. I have come to the First Wagons, I have made and lost friends, I have respected and lost respect for people, I have been claimed as the woman of a wonderful man. I have celebrated life, and I have celebrated lives lived by those that are now gone. I have shed tears and laughter. I have changed! I have grown. I am not the same Jaella I was when I first came, and I won't be the same Jaella I am today as time ticks away. Change will come. With it, I will change as well. I will grow. I might not be able to control the forces of change around me, but I can control how I respond to them. I have that power. It is a very strong power, and one that people tend to forget. Yes, things happen we have no control over. That doesn't mean we still do not retain control of our selves. When we blame our actions on others, or on events surrounding us, that is really taking away our own responsibility. It is selling ourselves short. Things change, things happen, but we still decide how we will cope with them. That is our choice. It belongs to no other. Instead of trying to lay the blame or the credit at the feet of another, we should keep it for our own. Our choices, good and bad, are the very core of what shapes us. Our own choices are the catalyst for the changes within all of us. I don't plan to give the power to change me against my will to anyone. That is a power that is mine. It will stay mine, as it should be.